News
The 10 Worst Restaurant Names
by Kelly Dobkin
We’ve rounded up some of the worst restaurant names we can find – silly, sexually suggestive, potty referencing and all – but we ran into trouble deciding which name was the absolute worst. That's where you come in! Check out the list below and then vote on which restaurant name you think has the most unfortunate moniker. We'll announce a winner at the end of the week based on your votes. Get ready to cringe!
Asellina
This Italian eatery at the Gansevoort Park Avenue Hotel in NYC has a name that probably means something beautiful in Italian, but in English suggests an unappetizing reference to a not-so-sanitary part of the human anatomy. Personally, we don't want to think about anyone's a*s anywhere near our food.
Beaver Choice
When we saw the name of this Arizona Scandinavian eatery, we couldn't help but think to ourselves: beaver...huh-huh. Good name, guys – we all know how much beavers love Scandinavian food.
Big Wong
This Manhattan Chinese restaurant is a Chinatown legend but its name makes us immature Americans snicker like frat boys.
Crabby Dick’s
This Mid-Atlantic seafood chain's name is probably just a silly play on the owner's first name, but it's certainly not making us hungry for King Crab legs.
Crapitto’s
This Houston Italian was going to call itself porta-pottie-itto's, but they decided that was too crass.
Fu King Chinese
Read the name of this Florida Chinese eatery too quickly and you might think someone just dropped the F-bomb.
Goat Lips
The owners of this Florida deli really should have run this name through Urban Dictionary before rolling with it. Just sayin'.
9021Pho
This Beverly Hills Vietnamese makes a humorous play on the famous zip code, but does it really work as a restaurant name? 9021...no.
Phat Phuc
While "Phuc" in Vietnamese actually means blessings and luck, the swear word it sounds like in English makes for a silly name for a London noodle bar. But phuc – we kind of love it.
Pink Taco
If a pervy, double entendre–laden name is going to work anywhere, it's Vegas, which is where this popular Mexican chain originated. While the name doesn't seem to be turning off most patrons on the whole, the brand has had a few run-ins with offended women in Arizona when it tried to open a Scottsdale location. But ownership defends itself by claiming the name is based on its signature dish – and although certain things are legal in Nevada, they sure aren't serving that.
More Lists:
Zagat Mentions
Archive
- December 2012
- November 2012
- October 2012
- February 2012
- January 2012
- December 2011
- November 2011
- October 2011
- September 2011
- August 2011
- July 2011
- June 2011
- May 2011
- April 2011
- March 2011
- February 2011
- January 2011
- December 2010
- November 2010
- October 2010
- September 2010
- August 2010
- July 2010
- June 2010
- May 2010
- April 2010
- March 2010
- February 2010
- January 2010
- December 2009
- November 2009
- October 2009
- September 2009
- August 2009
- July 2009
- June 2009
- May 2009
- April 2009
- March 2009
- February 2009
- January 2009
- December 2008
- November 2008
- October 2008
- September 2008
- August 2008
- July 2008
- June 2008
- May 2008
- April 2008
- March 2008
- February 2008
- January 2008
- December 2007
- November 2007
- October 2007
- September 2007
- August 2007
- July 2007
- June 2007
- May 2007
- April 2007
- March 2007
- February 2007
- January 2007
- December 2006
- November 2006
- October 2006
- September 2006
- August 2006
- July 2006
- June 2006
- May 2006
- April 2006
- March 2006
- February 2006
- January 2006
- December 2005
- November 2005
- October 2005
- September 2005
- August 2005
- July 2005
- June 2005
- May 2005
- April 2005
- March 2005
- February 2005
- January 2005
62 Comments
Add a new commentMar. 2007
Get your mind out of the guttter. This is 7th grade humor.
Jan. 2011
Was this article not posted a few months ago? Is Zagat running out of material to write about?
Sep. 1999
What about Portland OR's Hung Far Low?
Sep. 1999
What about Portland OR's Hung Far Low?
Feb. 2008
Many years ago I was invalpariso, Chile and saw a restaurant called Pussys. Since I had just had lunch, I passed. The menu they had posted looked great and it seemed like a great place to eat.
Ernest
Apr. 2007
We used to live in Cupertino, CA and nearby, there was a restaurant called "OK Chinese Fast Food". Not as disturbing as some of these, but definitely not the adjective you want to use in trying to get people to come into your establishment. We never tried it...
Jan. 2004
How about Ye Olde Cock Inn in Manchester, UK?
Jan. 2009
Sam and Ella's Chicken Palace in Tahlequah OK, might want to ask them to cook your chicken a little longer.
Apr. 2011
Hey, I've eaten at Beaver Choice! The food there is really good stuff. The family that runs the place is Swedish, and lived in Poland and Canada before moving to Arizona. They picked the beaver as an emblem of their Canadian pride. At the bottom of the receipt, it says "Silly name, AWESOME food!" and they're right.
Oh, and for dessert there... BEAVER BALLS. Swear to god true.
Feb. 2006
Here in San Francisco we have one for the list: a restaurant that first opened in the Castro called the "Squat and Gobble".
Apr. 2008
There is a restaurant in Rosemead, CA (east of Los Angeles) called My Dung.
Oct. 2002
More years back than I'd care to admit, there was a modest cafe in Topeka Kansas called "The Squat 'n' Gobble." This really seemed to capture the concept of the quick-bite restaurant, yet it seemed ... a bit offputting, too. Could it possibly still be there?
Jun. 2011
When I was a kid I used to make fun of a place called Phukket Thai, then I grew up.
Jul. 2010
Or simply "The Wurst Sausage Grille and Beer Garden" in Healdsburg, CA
Aug. 2011
My favorite name has to be Pho Kim Long in Las Vegas. Don't say it too fast. Funny name, but great food.
May. 2011
In the Dallas / Fort Worth area, we have a chain of restaurants called Pho King Way. My son loves that he can not get grounded for saying, "you know, if that restaurant closes, there will be no Pho King Way" Clever child.
Jul. 2008
To all you with no sense of humor. I was lmao. These people knew what they were doing, and this isnt the first time this list has been done
Jun. 1999
"But phuc – we kind of love it." TMI!
Aug. 2011
If you are hungry and thirsty don't ever go to Red Lobster in Inglewood, when they tell you 20 min. waiting to be seated they realy mean 45 min. If you order a drink it will take at least an hour to get it and if you even dare to complain to Brandon (the manager) he will be so sarcastic that will make you never want to go back.
Oct. 2001
Is the long wait because of the restaurant name? If not, what's the point of your comment?
Aug. 2011
the worst name by far is "Kelly Dobkin". Obviously represents a mind that's in the sewer.
Aug. 2011
I lived in Las Vegas for many years and ate at The Pink Taco once and only once and swore on my grave after that experience that I would NEVER eat there again......I love Mexican food and in my opinion The Pink Taco is the WORST Mexican food I have ever had......Mexican food is pretty basic....and the best Mexican food stays true to that....the culinary highbrows and cooking staff at The Pink Taco spends so much time and effort trying to "fancy up" their food and worry about it's "presentation" on the plate, that somewhere along the line they completely forgot about how it tastes and what makes the simplicity that is great Mexican food.....I would NEVER recommend to anyone to go to this place in Vegas for Mexican food.....if you want the real deal in Mecican food in Vegas, go to Viva Mercados....
Oct. 2008
Mexican food is my favorite, and like any cuisine there are simple dishes and complicated ones. For example, mole sauce is quite complicated and intricate to make and many restaurants try to "simplify" and save money it by cutting corners; as it is my favorite Mexican dish I judge a restaurant by its mole. Period.
Aug. 2011
Poopsie's pizza in Pembroke MA.
Aug. 2011
Crabby Dick wanted a good Fu King so he popped round to Asellina who lived in 9021Pho. He showed her his Big Wong and she offered to put her Goat Lips round it.. He said he preferred her Pink Taco, for him it was a Beaver Choice, he always preferred a Phat Phuc. This story like the article is a load of Crapitto.
Jun. 2008
Very Witty, indeed!
May. 2011
Nice!
Mar. 2004
Well done !
May. 2004
Are you kidding .. is that what Zagat has lowered itself too. Its hard enough for restuarants today without and indusrty site ridiculing them. How about a worse name competition: My vote goes to Kelly Dobkin
Mar. 2008
There is restaurant on Wilshire Blvd in Korea Town named Young Dong
Oct. 2002
I've (unfortunately) eaten at the Fu King in Lake City, Florida. The food is as questionable as the name.
Oct. 2006
I love raunchy humor as much as anybody but this feels completely out of place here. So much for the venerable Zagat brand.
I predict that heads will roll over this.
Oct. 2002
Hopefully your head. You're a douche.
May. 2011
Snap!@
Aug. 2003
There's a restaurant on Queens Blvd named Yuki Sushi - and it is.
Aug. 2011
The only was to really appreciate the value of this article is to be socially intolerant and have a filthy imagination. I'm neither.
Oct. 2002
You're also not a decent speller. "The only was to ..."
Jul. 2006
I was recently in the Outer Banks in North Carolina and there was a huge seafood restaurant named Sanitary. We all though that was pretty gross!
Jan. 2008
There was a Chinese restaurant in the Chicago area called "Eat First Chinese Restaurant"....and the sister restaurant was "Eat #2 First Chinese Restaurant"
Jul. 2007
Another good one is the Flying Beaver Bar and Grill in Richmond, BC. It's in a float plane terminal on the North bank of the Fraser River, just South of Vancouver International Airport. The name comes from one of the common types of float planes in service up there, the DeHavilland Beaver. The beer is good, the food is good, and you can watch the planes take off and land in the river while you're there. If the weather's not so good for dining al fresco, the riverside wall is all glass so you can still get a good view. I go there every time go to Vancouver!
Nov. 2001
Imagine my disappointment when the Colonette Diner in Jersey City changed its name to the Jersey City Diner. I hear the food is still pretty rough on the colon, though.
Jun. 2003
No list like this could be complete without Fat Ho Burgers in Waco, TX. It's right around the corner from the Gospel Cafe.
Oct. 2008
Wish I could upload the picture taken in front of the sign of this establishment in SC: CAPTAIN POO's
Mmmmm, sounds appetizing, No?!
K. Alltop
Dec. 2007
The Wang Kee seafood restaurant has operated for many years on Lamma Island in Hong Kong. The salt and pepper prawns rank with the best. But that name!
Mar. 2008
Here's one of my favorites: Located on Shattuck Ave., in downtown Berkeley, CA., (LOL...home of Chez Panisse!!!) is the venerable old Chinese American eatery, "King Dong." ...No kidding, go look it up; been there for years!
Aug. 2011
How's it possible that the restaurant, Money Shot in Chicago got passed over?
Aug. 2003
My personal favorite is Pho King in Seaside, CA. It's actually a pretty good, inexpensive Vietnamese joint, but if you pronounce "pho" correctly -- or even if you Americanize it -- the name of this place invariably prompts snickers.
Oct. 2010
True story: In the late 70s or early 80s we had a Fu King Kitchen in our neighborhood. It didn't take long before someone filled in the blank.
So, for old times sake - That's the one I'm picking.
May. 2005
I would try any of these places over applebees any day
Apr. 2010
Or try the place on Lake of the Ozarks in Missouri called Big Dick's Halfway Inn. Not even kidding.