Zagat Survey Discussions

Cynthia, good idea. Just remember to include tax as well, so the portion that you are allotting for tip isn't being lost to tax.

When we eat out with friends we split the check regardless of who orders what. Maybe it works out and maybe it doesn't it's not a big deal. On the other hand we are full time RV'ers and when out with other people from that community we always get separate checks. Most are on fixed income ie.. Social Security and that's how they always do it regardless of the group size. When we were first introduced to the practice we found it strange but we have come to accept it and even prefer it to splitting with this group because we now don't have to watch what we order.

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making your dream trip to Italy a reality

No need to be insulting and no need for what I'm reading as a personal attack ("by and large this is a women's issue"). I was simply asking a question. What you've said explains something we "average" diners don't know. Thank you for that explanation.

There is no need to be insulted, and since I don't know you personally I don't know how you can perceive this as a "personal attack." There are other points of view here besides your own, and although I know you think that asking for separate checks (for a ten-top) is perfectly reasonable, those of us who are assisting your dining experience have a point of view as well. Peace. 

Ah, Robert has implicitly pointed out a real difference between many restaurants here and those in Europe. Here the bill is started on computers from the start, so that it would indeed be burdensome for the waiter to keep a running tally on every diner at the table. (Robert is almost right; I haven't been a waiter since I took orders in a diner many decades ago, way before computers.) In Europe, the running tab is usually still kept only on paper for the whole table, so although it takes a little time, waiters seem quite willing to go around the table for individual totals.

As a guy, I've never been involved in an all-female group.
But even when multigenders are involved, the awkwardness of such situations is one reason I avoid going out in large groups if possible. Several ideas have been presented here that seem to have merit, but everything depends on the situation. Seems to me the key is, be flexible. So, for example, I almost always like a first course (they're usually more interesting) but if nobody else is getting one, I just skip it.

One thing I've noticed is that in many restaurants these days (the kind that larger groups tend to go to), the main-course salad prices often approach the prices of other entrées; this development ought to help even things out. 
So food isn't the problem - it's the alcohol, if some drink and some don't. If I have a glass or a bottle, and others don't, I try to make sure I pay enough to cover it.  Also, though it's a bit of work, I don't see why the person in charge can't roughly figure what each person owes and assess accordingly.

As for servers doing separate checks, of course if you're going to do that, you should ask at the beginning before anyone orders anything. I understand it can be a pain in the neck for the establishment; some accommodate it, some don't. One paradox is that the less expensive places are more likely to accommodate the 10-check-table than the upscale ones, yet servers in the lower-brow establishments have less to gain. 

If Michael and Robert are talking about serving in the upscale places, sorry, there really can't be all that many such ladies' groups coming in. (To put it another way, if you have lots of groups of 8-10 women showing up every day, then almost by definition you're not an upscale place; groups like that don't pay the prices.) 

And finally, I do think restaurants could probably do a better job of recognizing the problem and looking for creative ways to handle it. One thing I saw done once was that a server spit out individual tabs for each person so each would know what they owed, but still only one actual bill. The opposite situation, when a place that ran $250 for lunch for four refused to consider 2 separate checks although we had wine and the other couple did not... well, that's just dumb, and we won't be going back there.

 

As a restaurant owner splitting checks is something we will never get away from. It is odd how 99% of the time it is a group of women out having a good time that want their checks split. Regardless, this is the restaurant industry and a service we must be able to provide. Opening 8-10 checks at the beginning of the meal is a nightmare and just plain impossible to coordinate betw. the kitchen, bar and even for one server to keep up with, especially if s/he has other tables to take care of. Alerting the server at the beginning of the meal is a HUGE help and I only wish more people would do this. The biggest nuisance about splitting checks is the tip. Over half the time we split checks the guests mess up when dividing up the total amount and instead of calculating the tip and then dividing the FULL amount by all 8 guests, they divide the check amount (oh, minus the tax- don't forget that miniscule amount) by the number of guests, everyone gets their credit card slips back (except that one kind soul who actually had the foresight to bring cash) and in the melee of giggles and more country club banter they all just sign the bottom line merely assuming the tip was included. This is why servers want to shoot those separate check hounds we all know and love. Please, please take the time and calculate the tip - trust me, your server(s) worked twice as hard for your group of 8 as they would have on two four-tops. In all fairness, we did just have a group of 20 ladies come in and the woman in charge told everyone in no uncertain terms to bring cash and told us ahead of time that there would be one check and she would ensure that her guests brought cash and they would take good care of the server(s). She did, they did and all I can say is thank you and you must have been in the restaurant industry before. 
Everyone should be required to work a couple of months in the restaurant biz. Trust me - you'd have a lot more appreciation for just how hard these people work and how much skill (and patience) is involved.

LADIES, if you are going to split a check for a large party and its
a busy night, bring a pen, paper, and a calculator.

 You want prompt service, well so do the other guests, and they
will have to wait for food and drinks while the server is figuring out
all your seperate checks, then they you usually give a mere pittance.

I was a server for over 30 years, and this is all so true, not to be sexist,
but it is FACT !!!! Men never ask for seperate checks or if they do
they just split the total. And if you do want separate checks, ask when
you sit down, not at the end of the meal.

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Of course, we always do that. As a female & a bookkeeper, I always have a calculator in my purse & there are places you can get tip calculators for your wallet. To do the tax, just do half of the tip or whatever works out for your area.

I disagree that with a group of friends things usually "even out the next time"; the same people order a salad and the extra glass of wine or port at the end of the meal. For this reason my friends and I only celebrate birthdays at BYOB restaurants because going out to dinner 10-12 times with a group of friends every year got very costly. Celebrations got much easier without the added hassle of noticing who was drinking (or not) and who ordered the extra appetizer. Plus we discovered a wide variety of new restaurants.
It's sad that it is primarily women who get so detailed and often ask for separate checks!

Bottom line to all this separate check stuff is that you are the one going out to eat and spend your hard earned money and you deserve to get what you want in a timely fashion and at a fair price.  Speaking unofficially for the restaurant staff of the world, please realize this is our business, and how we pay our bills. When you "forget" to tip on even one of the split checks it hurts us both in our wallets and makes us frustrated, especially if you compliment us on the way out for the 'great service' but didn't leave at least 15%. The compliments are great for morale but the last time I checked the bank wasn't accepting morale as a form of mortgage payment.
If you want separate checks any restaurant worth their weight in lamb chops should be able to accomodate you in one fashion or the other, just don't make it harder than it is please.
Happy dining

MichaelH2648 wrote:
. . . how I am supposed to remember which one of you had three cosmos and which one of you had four or two? 

A waiter who can't keep track of which diner ordered which food or drink ought to be working in a fast-food place rather than a fine restaurant. Whenever a server asks "Who gets the .. ?" I take a couple of dollars off the tip I was intending to give. If the server actually puts the item down in front of the wrong diner, I deduct a little more. It's not hard to keep track; top restaurants do so routinely.

If MichaelH2648 will identify the restaurant in which he works, I shall avoid it when I visit New York.
 
 

Splitting a check for a small party or a large party is fairly simple with the new POS systems coming out; on the payment screen, or the order screen, there is the option of splitting items off the main bill to separate bills. If it is merely a matter of running a large number of credit cards for one check, at differing amounts, that, too, is simple, as you can input the amount requested for each credit card. As for figuring out who had what, I've never been averse to the server putting down the check and asking to put a number one next to the items number one had (or wants to pay for), a number two next to the items number two had, etcetera. And as far as a tip, well, it seems most places automatically add a gratuity to tables of 6 or 8 or more. The tip can then be automatically added to each individual check. This whole process really shouldn't take more than a minute and a half. So the server is "stuck" at the computer? Well, it's no different than when the server is inputting an order for a large table, and probably takes less time. If the server is fearful of not being able to pay attention to the other tables in his/her station, then ask another server to look after your tables for a minute, or ask the manager for help processing the bill.

What I have had to deal with, and more often than I care to say, is friends who have turned out to be lousy tippers, especially when contributing to a pool of dinner tabs. I had no idea that a few of my friends, and sometimes co-workers, were such cheapskates, and I've left well over my share to cover their lousy tips! I am quite sure the percentage left out was the tip because the subject was discussed when money retrieved from wallets and handbags. There is one family member I will not dine out with any longer because of his or her "cheapskatedness." Since I don't drink I tend to order something pricey and make sure I get dessert then my share is more on a par with my drinking friends/family/co-workers.