Where's the beef - and pork and lamb? It's all right here in San Francisco and in massive portion sizes, to boot. Look no further for the city's most outrageously giant cuts of steak, many of which are part of multiprotein feasts for two. We ate through the city's best steak situations and then singled out the most over-the-top among them to bring you this: the 8 Most Gigantic and Amazing Steak Plates in SF.
Epic Meal for Two at Epic Roasthouse
How Big: 32-oz. steak and two pounds of Maine lobster
Juicy Details: The turf portion of this surf 'n' turf presentation is the tender and coveted Tomahawk rib cut.
Side Dish: Don't miss chef Parke Ulrich's sinful "Julia Child potatoes," a buttery and cheesy gratin based on a side dish that his mother used to make from an old Julia Child cookbook.
The Damage: $198
369 The Embarcadero; 415-369-9955
The A5 Experience at 5A5 Steak Lounge
How Big: Four ounces each of Wagyu New York, filet, rib-eye and ribcap
Juicy Details: The meat is all A5 Wagyu and is 100% Japanese.
Side Dish: 5A5 has the options of regal pairings including Johnnie Walker King George V and Louis XIII.
The Damage: AQ; currently $525
244 Jackson St.; 415-989-2539
Ranch Cookout for Two at Bluestem Brasserie
How Big: A daily changing selection of four grilled meats, typically eight ounces of beef, 11 ounces of duck, 10 ounces of pork and 7 ounces of lamb
Juicy Details: Bluestem is the place to experience grass-fed beef. A bavette is the cut most often used here - often accompanied with duck breast, pork rib or sausage and lamb leg.
Side Dish: The feast comes with a daily changing side dish such as dino kale with prosciutto and balsamic plus the fixed sides of sauteed cipollini onions, a mushroom medley and cornbread.
The Damage: $75
1 Yerba Buena Ln.; 415-547-1111
49-er Porterhouse at Bobo's
How Big: 49 ounces of porterhouse steak
Juicy Details: Call ahead of time to make sure this is going to be available when you want it. More, um, petite eaters can opt for a 20-oz. option for $59.95.
Side Dish: Many diners go for the delicious creamed spinach and the throwback twice-baked potato because - you know - vegetables.
The Damage: $149.49
448 Brannan St.; 415-495-1111
Asado Mixto at Lolinda
How Big: Eight ounces of various pork sausages, plus six-eight onces of beef
Juicy Details: The sausages are chorizo and morcilla (blood sausage), while the beef cuts are flap loin and short rib. Everything has a lovely char from the wood-fired grill.
Side Dish: The Mixto comes with potatoes and shishito peppers, but think about adding some kale with mushrooms and chili flakes too.
The Damage: $36
2518 Mission St.; 415-550-6970
Chicago Rib Steak at Alfred's Steakhouse
How Big: 32 ounces
Juicy Details: Seeking a more modest cut but still want to go over the top? While the porterhouse ($51) is 32 ounces, normal people can start at five ounces.
Side Dish: Steaks come with one complimentary side dish, including fries, creamed spinach and housemade ravioli, but the standout is the buttermilk mashed potatoes.
The Damage: $61
659 Merchant St.; 415-781-7058
Porterhouse Super-Size at Osso Steakhouse
How Big: 32 ounces of New York steak plus 10 ounces of filet mignon
Juicy Details: All of the fat is cut out, so all you're getting is pure and tender prime Black Angus.
Side Dish: This can feed two very heavy and hungry eaters but is most often ordered amongst four people.
The Damage: $114.95
1177 California St.; 415-771-6776
King Henry VIII at House of Prime Rib
How Big: The restaurant prefers not to reveal ounces and instead describes the offering as a thick cut with the possibility of seconds, but the portion seems to average around 14 ounces.
Juicy Details: The restaurant also does not like to offer specifics about where the meat comes from other than the Midwest and the northern part of the plain. Still, this and Bobo's are the city's two kitschiest go-tos for "fancy" steak.
Side Dish: A generous amount of sides come with this cut, including salad, mashed potatoes, Yorkshire pudding, creamed spinach and fresh horseradish.
The Damage: $42.85
1906 Van Ness Ave.; 415-885-4605